tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987733792320855434.post8143290112038895507..comments2023-05-10T06:44:25.835-06:00Comments on Anita Stansfield: SOME SHAMEFUL THOUGHTS ON SHAMEAnnahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09622181812776295805noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987733792320855434.post-25719820427539058522016-03-05T08:30:45.834-07:002016-03-05T08:30:45.834-07:00I love the differentiation between shame and guilt...I love the differentiation between shame and guilt. Guilt helps motivate us to be better. <br />Keep fighting those demons, you are an amazing woman and should be treated as such. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987733792320855434.post-8202676190868510562016-03-04T15:10:55.314-07:002016-03-04T15:10:55.314-07:00I have several of Brene's books and I've h...I have several of Brene's books and I've heard her TED talks. I think I'm slightly scared to face the monsters in my life because I haven't listened to the audio books. Well, the reader on one of them lisps her s's so there's that (hard to listen to). It is hard to face down the inner voices of doubt about ourselves and to make the changes that are needed to our thought patterns. First there is recognition, second is actually knowing what to do about those thoughts so that they can change. A lot of times the best thing that I've found to do is to acknowledge the thoughts and tell myself of their untruth. I left a man who had abused me, my sister, my children and I thought that hanging on to that marriage was the right thing to do until the cognitive dissonance that I felt got to be overwhelmingly and obviously flawed. It helped that I was trying to explain to a friend (on our daily walks togther) why I was allowing things to happen that I didn't really want to happen. I've felt vulnerable about writing things on facebook, on my blog, about speaking up about my ideas at work. I've been taken advantage of because of this. Acknowledgment of the issue does help, but it is a lifetimes work to overcome and understand natural tendencies to feel ashamed.Strawberry Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03395571842364752995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7987733792320855434.post-68509319885098117472016-02-25T16:02:34.941-07:002016-02-25T16:02:34.941-07:00This is something I've always admired about yo...This is something I've always admired about you. As you know, I also grew up in an environment where shaming was very common, but you opened my eyes to a better way of living! You were always such a great example of unconditional love, and acceptance. That attitude is so much more constructive to growth and I've always looked up to you for it! You are definitely one of my heroes and I still think about our time together often. I hope I can give my children the gift of love like you were able to give to me. Love you Anita!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12226198119362926995noreply@blogger.com